Thursday, November 10, 2011
Starting over made easy
Relationships have their ups and down, but when it's over it's over. Whether in your 20s, 30s, 40s or whatever age group, for a lot of people, it's hard to just start over. It seems to be especially hard for people who have been in long term relationships and middle aged people who don't like the bar and club atmosphere. What are they suppose to do, give up? Online dating has provided an opportunity for these groups of people. It even makes it easier. The profile tests they take when signing up provides a better match than someone you may meet at a bar or club and realize you have nothing in common and then the search starts again. At least with an online dating account you are provided with many options with people who shares common interests and personalities. People who don't have the time to go and find their sole mate, online dating makes it easy. And for the people who may have forgot how to date because their coming out of a long term relationship, this provides an easy out for them. The hard part of looking for someone is now made easy!
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I have no experience in online dating, but I agree with you! Online dating makes it a lot easier to find someone that you can relate to. The thing that scares me about this is the fact that the information could be false and you think someone is someone they are not. This can not only get dangerous but is also a let down.
ReplyDeleteYou are completely right about it shortens the process of finding a good possibility. I think it is more for older people though. there are a lot of important lessons you learn from meeting new people and learning how to deal with dissimilarities. Also, you learn a lot about yourself in dealing with traits you have never seen before in other people. Thus it is very important to learn who you are before you try and find someone you think you will mesh with when really you might have had all of the wrong ideas about what you wanted.
ReplyDeleteWhen you are in a long-term relationship, you sometimes forget how to get back in the dating scene. You are so use to being with someone that you forget how to talk to the opposite of sex. My friends will call this behavior “being out the game”. It’s a lot easier to chat or send a message to someone online rather than talking to someone face to face. I never tried online dating but I can see why it could be easier for someone to find that perfect match through the internet.
ReplyDeleteI have tried online dating. There I said it, but even more, I am married to someone I met through eHarmony. While I do not know the statistics about the demographics of online dating, I am one of those middle-aged guys that had no interest in returning to the club/bar scene or other such pick-up places. I had a busy and full life at the time and did not want the "thrill of the chase". I found the process of online dating to be convenient to my schedule, giving the opportunity to move as quickly or slowly as I wanted, and the choice of how to set up a first face to face meeting. I believe that using only a little bit of common sense and care can make this meeting a stranger safe and enjoyable. My recommendation, especially if you are a woman concerned with safety is to never give out personal contact information online. Use the communication paths set up through the website. When you are ready to meet, make it casual, in public, and let someone know where you are and who (as you know them) you are meeting. My first meeting was in a public restaurant, we arrived separately so that each had the opportunity to end the meeting without having to rely on the other to get home. I would recommend several casual meetings until one is comfortable before pursuing any romantic options. Do your own background check, such as verify a person's place of employment by a simple phone call asking to speak with them. There are several options to check someone out, but my question is this, do you do the same thing for the slick talking or hot looking other person you meet at the bar? If you are concerned about someone you meet online, then why not about someone you meet in the dark recesses of some cheap pickup bar?
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