SkaDate: If You Build It, They Will Come

So now that you know all about online dating, you decide that it isn't enough. You figure that you have a voice too. So you want to build your own online dating site. Well SkaDate is the software for you! It is very easy to implement. It is user friendly and best of all it is pretty reasonable...$350 for 1 license!  You can buy two for $600 and three for $900. The 3 license version comes with mobile capabilities. They have an upsale for $95/mth, which gives you more features and more support. They have TONS of features and templates. I looked through what they had to offer, and it almost made me want to start a site! I would recommend  this to way to startup to anyone. You could be up and running in a few days!

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Communication is oh so important!

Differences in communication styles of the Sites eHarmony and Match.com

Using Match.com users are able to search matches immediately after signing up and can locate or talk to people found in their search. The match pair is remained hidden until it is communicated that they choose to “reveal themselves”, this usually occurs when the pair decide to meet face to face for an official date. This site is useful for people that don’t mind making initial contact for their match and prefer that hands on experience; as opposed to leaving the decision up to an algorithm made up by some person in a computer lab. In contrast eHarmony strongly advises that members take precautions before making open ended contact; they have a set of guidelines for information exchange. This can take weeks to complete and is only good for people with some patience, this is cited as one of eHarmonys biggest drawback. The site also offers templates for first time emails to avoid the awkwardness of the situation, which most users loved. Because of the guidelines and restrictions eHarmony has on their site, it may take a while to ever meet your match. Although the success rate of eHarmony is one of the top; the “dating training wheels” need to be removed at some point so a real relationship can develop. It’s said that communication is the basis for any and every relationship, so online dating sites need to always improve this criteria to boost the amount of people that join their sites and success rates.

Hitch: The Online Dating University

Do you still have questions about online dating? Is there something else that you would like to know? If so, there is a school for you. Online dating org has an "Online Dating University" for you! On this website, you can view related articles, reviews of the top sites, safety issues and anything else that you might can think of.

They just had their "17th Edition of the Carnival of Online Dating" . It included links to articles by very respected writers, experts and more. I must say, that it is a little sad though. This is what we have come to. I know that we all can use some help, but what ever happened to good ole fashioned trying. It seems like we are trying to take the error out of relationship making, which to me might make more bad relationships. I mean no one is perfect. However, if you say the right things, act the right way and come off as the perfect soul mate, what happens when the real you shows up? What happens when you can't get more coaching when you need it, or the situation dictates something different than what you read? Most of have seen the movie "Hitch" with Will Smith and Kevin James. It ended up working out for Kevin and Will's characters, but that is Hollywood, and not real life.

What do you think? Knowledge is good, but wouldn't you rather see the bad and decide if you can tolerate it?

Avoiding the Awkward Pauses!

Everyone knows how awkward a first date can be unless you already know the person somehow. With online dating, meeting someone for the first time can be nerve racking! "What are we going to talk about?" is the first thing that goes through your mind. In order to relieve yourself of this stress and calm your nerves, simply come up with a list questions/topics to talk about and avoid the awkwards pauses. A good conversation starter is always "How was your day?". This shows your politeness and manners which gives your date a good first impression. Your putting the focus on them and allowing them to talk a little about themselves and who doesn't like to do that? It also gives you a chance to see what kind of person they are. Do they constantly complain and talk about all the crappy things that happened that day? Do they focus on the positive things that happen? Or do they take the bad things that happened and turn them into something positive? This tells a lot about how people percieve things. Then, of course, you can go into the questions of things that they do in their spare time such as hobbies, etc allowing you to see if there is anything you have in common. If this is the case, this gives you an opportunity to build on the thing you have in common. You're able to connect and allow for a growing conversation. This leads to more questions building on the thing you have in common like how long you've been doing it, why you are interested in it, etc. On the other hand, if its something you don't have in common, your now giving the person time to tell you about it, putting the attention on him/her. Putting the focus on your date will gain you brownie points. It shows your curious about the person, your a good listener and allows you to learn more about the person. But these are just a few simple ways to avoid the awkwardness a lot of people dread on a first date with someone you've never met before. Next time you go on a date, be prepared with topics/questions!

Online Dating on Facebook?

Is Facebook stealing the spotlight? New features available on Facebook now seem to imitate features on paid dating sites. One of the ways Facebook has been stealing away customers is by adding features, such as the new subscription button, available on everyone’s profile. The button allows people to subscribe to things you post without being your friend. It is kind of like followers, on twitter or a fan club, not to sure what do you guys think? Anyways this feature allows you to pick certain information to share and you can group this information as wanted. This allows people to create groups and almost a sub-profile on Facebook. Dating online through Facebook isn’t so uncommon, so will this continue to grow with every Facebook update? I think so; Facebook has enough users to undermine the traditional online dating sites. As soon as users incorporate their “dating profile” through subscriptions, why pay somewhere else? 

Top Profile Turnoffs

When you are online dating, the biggest way for someone to understand who you are is through your profile. Bellow, are the top turnoffs for men and women when looking at others profiles.

Top Turnoffs For Men:

1. If a woman states all the things she does not want, instead of listing the things she does want. This makes him feel like he will never be able to you happy.
2. He does not want to here the same old things or know all of your accomplishments. He wants to get to know the real you.

Top Turnoffs For Women:

1. If a man does not have correct grammar and spelling mistakes on his profile. That catches a girl's eye very quick, but not in a good way!
2. If a guy is careless about which photos he posts. Those hat and sunglasses photos probably look nice, but she is going to want to see the full picture of you!

The only thing you need to remember is be as honest as possible! Trust and honesty are key in a relationship. You don't want to start off the relationship by lying!


Resources:
http://www.yourtango.com/experts/jaime-richards/worst-online-dating-profiles-ive-ever-seen

How to Succeed

So we have spoken quite a bit about the safety of online dating and what you should do to ward away “the weirdos”, but what about tips on how to succeed online and actually meet someone great.  We found this article about how to NOT screw up online dating.  One thing the article suggested was that you should put your “best foot forward” when filling out your profile.  One statement though caught our eye and made us start thinking.  The article said to not talk about your shortcomings.  Well what really are shortcomings?  We all agreed that shortcomings meant something that you think others will find unsatisfactory.  But the key word here is shortcomings in your eyes.  What some people may see as a shortcoming may be something attractive to another.  We came up with a couple of examples and we wanted to know what you guys thought.  The best example we could come up with was the smoker.   The person that smokes could see that as a shortcoming but if they were to meet another smoker then there would be no problem.  A smoker could also meet a non-smoker that simply didn’t care that they smoked.   Another common example would be a person that’s overweight.  They might see their weight as a shortcoming but some woman simply like a bigger man… a sense of protection.  We just found it odd that so many of the articles and responses we have found on online dating are ones concerned with how dangerous and unsafe online dating could be.  This one was actually tips on how to succeed in online dating and some were very interesting.  What do you guys think?

http://www.faceromance.com/online_dating/